I’m sprawled out in my living room in my undergarments. I know I have to get dressed soon, but I need to grab another field outfit so that I can feed the rest of the animals. My dogs ( they both know better) thought it would be a good idea to go poo on the back porch because my husband went to the store without them. Now, you know most men don’t really like to shop long. I had just taken them out before I went to work. Even if his auto part shopping lasted 5 hours, ( which of course, it didn’t) they can both hold it quite well. Their spite poo costed them the rest of the late morning and early afternoon to sit on the porch with it. My little princess does not like to get dirty and she doesn’t tolerate ill smells well, so it must have been rough. The younger adolescent pup doesn’t care so much, so I know it was his idea. They both participated. My princess probably figured my husband would yell, and she would get cleaned up right away. He started to, but he decided it would be more effective to let them sit with it and think about what they did. When I got home, I was lucky enough to get poo cleaning duty. Hooray! Ok, that may have been dripping with sarcasm. I was tempted to let them stay put until I got back from church. Since that would just be wrong, I armed myself with pet friendly, biodegradable cleaner and the pressure hose and pressure washed the porch, changed the nozzle so that I could lather and rinse the recalcitrant twosome and repeat everything. That was the first part. I then let them run around outside and handle their doggie business. Then back again for their detailed bath ( oh fun). Did I mention they are both pretty large? My little princess sat still and handed me each paw so that I could scrub in between her toes and she was so grateful for that bath. The next little heathen wasn’t so easy. He let me know that in no uncertain terms was he going to get in that water. Oh no! Definitely not! I already had to half drag him in there! I was greatly worn at this point after work and several chores at home. It wasn’t easy to keep him from popping out of the tub like a big huge fuzzy piece of popcorn. I finally talked him down so that he would sit for most of the rest of his bath. I had the most trouble rinsing his neck. The soap just did not want to come out. It lasted longer than either of us was comfortable with. I finally got him dried and into his chair (they each have their own chair). I had to get myself cleaned up but now I still have to deal with the last of our menagerie before I clean up again so that I can get dressed for church. If this sounds like a rant to you, ding ding ding….you’ve won the prize.